The art of football penalties

Watched the reply of last nights game (chealsea vs. barcelona). Felt the decider came down to the decision of penalty or not? I have always admired the art of getting or getting away with penalties.
Here are some things i would like to share.

Getting penalties:
1) Throw a tantrum whenever anybody touches you ... Just like Christiano Ronaldo
2) Believe that you have been shot from a snipper... Just like Drogba
3) Golek, golek, golek and golek lagi .... Just like dalam iklan 'cari bakat berlakon' tu
4) Beliakkan mata, menganga besar2 pleading to the ref ... Just like Pipo Inzaghi
5) Berlakon injured macam dah nyawa2 ikan..... Just like Thiery Henry
6) Bump into the last man but claim he pushed you... Just like Luca Toni
7) Just fall down by yourself and look all stupid... Just like El-Hadji Diouf (especially time kat liverpool)
8) Jump into the box when fouled even though ur 10 meters away ... Just like Ronaldo Gemuk
9) Always fall on the ball and stop the game to pressure the ref to make a decision ... Just like Luis Figo.

Getting away with penalties:
1) Claim its the hand of god/ or gods intervention ...Just like Maradonna (personal favourite)
2) Act like ur stomach hurt (eventhough kena tangan and it happened 10 minutes ago)... Just like John Terry
3) Have a go at the lines man and act all righeous .... Just like Ashley Cole
4) Ngengek to the coach and ask him to have a go at the ref ...... Just like Oshea
5) Always remind the ref he looks stupid after convincing him you have just watched the replay... Just like Morinho
6) At the press conference before the game, claim the ref always give penalties against you... Just like Ferguson, Morinho, Benitez, Wenger
7) Say ' i cannot deny our confirm it was a penalty'.... Just like linggam


ps.. Add more if u guys think of anything